June 27, 2011

  • I'm writing this after my recent revelation that I just missed the bus to campus.  Talk about epic fail.

    Well, same old, same old.  I woke up today missing Phuc and wondering how he's doing, and wondering if or when he'll ever contact me or talk to me again.  But I have a big day of research ahead of me, and I'm really crossing my fingers that my first day of research goes well.

    Today is going to be my first day without the cohorts of my fellowship, which I'm a little sad about.  They're just a really nice group of people.  Except I kind of Michael Scott'd that group, where I thought we were all going to be the best of buddies forever and ever, LOL.  And there's this guy just referring to me as his co-worker! I'm just waiting for the day until he drops the word "friend!" D: Sucker! Well underneath it all, I'm sure they all secretly think I'm awesome.  OR SO I LIKE TO THINK >.<

    After Phuc broke up with me, I spent a lot of time wondering, "What do I do with all this time?" It was sincerely hard for me to think back to a life before Phuc. For nearly two weeks, all I could do was keep busy by never coming home, just staying out with my co-workers or with the Christians until the late hours of the night, because I had no idea what I would do when I get home.  I knew that if I came home, I would have nothing to do except be alone with my thoughts and I knew that all I would do is daydream of Phuc with heartbreak and longing.

    Well, so I finally remembered what it was I used to do with all my time alone at home when I was single.

    VIDEO GAMES@@@@

    I was too tired to go out this weekend after a really busy Friday, so I just spent the greater part of the last two days BEASTING at Dynasty Warriors 4. Oldie but goodie!  All the memory card saves got wiped out so I'm starting fresh, which is fine by me.  XD  I just got Sun Shang Xiang's weapon up to level 9, ahh I need to get more pro at this game again so I can win her level 10 weapon!!!  im'ma use that sol chakram on phuc for dumping me!!!  D:<  and i just took out freakin 3k people by my dainty little self, can you SAY badass????  But I ALSO went to the gym and went grocery shopping with my housemates, so I wasn't just being a total slob all weekend, I swear!!!  And all of the sudden "what do i do with all this time" is no longer an issue, LOLOLOL. 

    OK I better go before I miss the next bus to campus too! :) This post kind of really really sucked so I'll come back after work and expand on it more.

    -+-

    Update at 10:22 PM PST.

    So this little "-+-" thing I do is the really cheap thing I use to cheat my way into posting more than once in one day.  Gooooooooooooo technicalities!!!!!!!!!!

    But anyway, my day ended up being pretty big!  It was kind of hilarious though, because I came into the lab at 10 a.m. and NO ONE WAS EXPECTING ME. OTL.  "Did you know we had an undergrad starting today?" "Nope." LUCKILY, people got their shit together and hustled me a good five hours of work.  It was very small stuff on the first day, including: I made the most exciting photocopies ever.  But I was as observant as a boss and tried to sponge in everything.  So I was pretty enthusiastic and it made my first day of noobie chores pretty fun.  Prepped a bunch of cell culture media, checked out some adipose cells, made a bunch of buffers, washed the shit out of some graduated cylinders, pipetted the face off some antibodies, aspirated the hell out of some cultures, labeled the ass off of centrifuge tubes, and ate my sandwich.  Used ethanol everywhere with zero regard for the rest of the world.  Like a total boss.  It was considered "chores" but there was a shit ton of stuff that I've never seen or heard of in any of the teaching labs so I was pretty stoked.  like wtf is an op-9? wtf is facs clean? wtf is a running buffer? WHAT DOES THAT TRYPSIN DO? TELL ME MORE ABOUT THIS ALPHA-MEM! SO THIS IS WHAT AN AUTOCLAVE LOOKS LIKE. SO THAT'S HOW YOU LABEL THAT SOMETHING IS STERILE. SO THIS WHERE YOU STORE THE FLASKS AND BEAKERS.  MOST... INTERESTING O___________O!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TEACH ME MOAR

    Mr. Lab Supervisor was intimidating and very welcoming at the same time.  Like he had a lot of apathy and enthusiasm at the same time.  Like... approachable yet made me fearful.  LOL.  @_@  I make it sound complex because it was!  Like he kept saying, "You'll get it, rookie," in a very "LOL OH U, WUTTA NOOB" way, while he kept winking in a nice "but you're doin' okay, kid" kind of way.  It was very weird and mixed but I walked away from the lab very warm and enthusiastic, like I've got that cool sports coach that's a total hardass but he really cares about his team kind of thing.  But I was like "wtf what is your personality, bro."

    Ms. Grad Student was suuuuper nice and let me shadow her all day and so mostly I did chores for her.  @_@.  FABIO Y U GONE FOR A MONTH!!  But at the end of the day I still felt like I learned a lot, so MISSION COMPLETE~

    After research, I finally checked out that coffee shop that I've wanted to go to since last year, and it was sooooo.. bitchin'.  Like, "why haven't I gone here sooner, what have i been doing with my life" kind of good.  I asked the guy, "I'm a first-timer here, so just make me something that'll really just make me want to come back," and the bro delivered.  Mango strawberry monsoon smoothie at The Coffee Block downtown? GET IT, THEN GET OUT OF HERE, BECAUSE IT WAS AWESOME.  Maybe it's because I haven't had any smoothies since who-knows-when besides my school smoothies, but it was so awesome.  So plans for next week include: getting that smoothie in my belly again.  Good shit!  SOMEONE, COME WITH ME ON MY NEXT SMOOTHIE RUN ^______________^

    Right after my smoothie run, my friend invited me to hang out at her church with the seductive strategy of "free dinner," so I ran for it and had a huge taco salad and a huge bowl of ice cream!  Then I consequently had to go to their worship thang.  I have a very loose faith; it's complicated, but the gist is that I believe that a creator caused the big bang and that JC was a pretty hip brotha from a virgin motha, but otherwise I consider church to be an hour-long singalong.  And I do love my singalongs.  Sang the hell out of all those worship songs.  But I do have amazing respect for all those wholesome Christian morals which I always try to pursue, and while I felt a little awkward during prayer, I will admit that I cried a little today at worship.  I kind of zoned out during the prayer parts, but the moral of the worship was this: your life can only experience a real, earnest transformation after you let go of all the bad stuff.  And I looked back at my life, and thought of all the things that I want to let go of.  I thought of all the things I wish I let go of earlier.  I thought about how much I want to let go of that weak, fragile person that I used to be.  Hard shit, but I feel like I'm finally getting somewhere.

    Anyhoo, my moods have been varying a little since yesterday's "I can rule the world" post, but overall still good.  Sometimes I can think of Phuc very nonchalantly, sometimes I can go quite a while without thinking of Phuc, and other times when I think of him I feel my heart sink to my stomach.  Hm.  To make things even nerdier, I feel like I've overcome my activation energy but my reaction still needs to go to completion, and for that to happen, I need to continue applying heat and constant stirring.  So umm...uhh............I've overcome the hardest part, but I need to keep working at it.  LOL.  GOOOOOOOOOO CHEMISTRY

    AND UH THE SQUARE ROOT OF 9 IS 3 D:

    My war cry during a game that required basic addition: "BUT YOU ONLY USE CALCULATORS IN HIGHER MATH CLASSES"

    WHATEVS, STILL A BOSS. :)

    lol that was the most scatterbrained rant ever