May 7, 2014

  • with a side of popcorn chicken

    Close your eyes and see it glisten, Barnaby.
    Listen, Barnaby…

    - Hello, Dolly!, Put On Your Sunday Clothes

    -+-

    -- "I hate everything!"
    "Christa, that's the biggest lie I've EVER heard."
    -- "Teehee, that's true!!" *giggles*

    -+-

    This week is one of those weeks where my wits are not about me. I am always tired and never hungry. I imagined myself bouncing back this week, after being sick with a nasty cold last week. But my PCR samples are almost a week old now, and I feel like I’ve achieved very little this week.

    The good is very, very good. I spent this past week with friends, almost non-stop for the last several days. Life felt well-paced, but I think the best part is that never, ever do I feel lonely these days. At lab, I have amazing co-workers that I get along with really well. I have old friends from undergrad and high school in town, and we try to spend time together when possible. I have new friends from my time here in San Diego, and we also find time for beers and happy hours. Even when those people are all not around, I have my sister a Google message away, and all my old friends and loved ones are all just a text message or a webcam call away. Work is great, and life is great. I am learning how to count my blessings.

    However, if something has huge weight for me, I can get stressed very easily. I am currently stressed very easily. But this is the part where I just suck it the fuck up, because that’s the kind of thing you have to do when something’s bigger than you. This is bigger than me.

    I was actually supposed to have a date today. He cancelled, and while that in itself is not very promising (in conjunction with the dwindling frequency in our text messages, but that’s another deal entirely), but I am secretly incredibly thankful for the opportunity to finally have some time for myself, and just chill. To just breathe. I’m currently sitting in the main student center of UCSD, eating popcorn chicken and boba. Blogging over a passion fruit black tea. This is alright. Right? Right. Breathe in the good air. Right.

    That’s right. I needed chicken.

    I have my eyes on the prize for tomorrow. I will come into lab in the morning, and I will dominate my PCR samples. I will go to my on-call meeting and dominate my lab meeting. I will run into whats-his-face and he will be like omg wow christa is so so fine and I’ll be like lol noob and walk away. Then I will go to lab and dominate my mousework. And I will learn western blotting and dominate this fuuuucking webcam chat and all will be awesome. I can see it now.

    This has been a hell of a week so far, and it’s only Wednesday.

    Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu