Cos' I've got weird values,
and radical thoughts about breakthrough.
If I told you, it'd just scare you,
so I gotta act like I'm caught up in the
same undertow.
- Walter Mitty and his Makeshift Orchestra, Dunce
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"Memories are not recycled like atoms and particles in quantum physics. They can be lost forever."
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I hope that everyone had a fantastic Thanksgiving and then some! I had amazing, epic plans for this Thanksgiving break. I would see all my friends and get ahead on all my schoolwork. My return to Sacramento would be truly glorious.
Except, I didn't factor my yearly ritual with my mom -- Black Friday shopping. We typically wake up in the early morn, but this year was the first time we began at midnight. For some reason, I underestimated how long we would take to shop. This is after two years ago, when we shopped for almost seventeen hours straight. But a lifetime's worth of clothes later, we finally got home at around 8 a.m., when I knocked out until late afternoon, waking up with a wicked cold. I instantly became largely unmotivated to distance myself from my cough syrup, but I was still ecstatic to spend time with three of my friends from high school: Jessica, Huong, and Khanh-Hien. Outside of that, my Thanksgiving break was full of bed rest and soup.
So as I write this, I am wrapped up in a blanket with a congested nose. I should be working on my Physics paper, or reading up on Biochemistry, or studying for Microbiology, but colds are always the bane of me -- they always render me completely infantile and lethargic.
But my first time home was a refreshing change from the old life. I think we could all feel that I was a slightly different person from when I left at the beginning of June. It's hard to articulate, but I just know that I liked it.
Because I have a headache and I currently really miss how it feels to breathe, there isn't as much liveliness to this post as I'd hope for. My mind is sluggish, instead focusing on the discomfort of my scratchy throat. There isn't bombarding amounts of excitement, sensationalism, insightfulness, or philosophy. Much has happened, but I don't have the motivation right now to dive into it. I just have the sniffles.
Except… there's something about being boring that I'm very thankful for. I miss being this comfortable, even if it's only transient, even if it's only until tomorrow morning when I leave again for Merced. For once, I'm not being tossed around, I'm not paranoid over social cues, I'm not stressing out over deadlines (although I actually should be; thanks, procrastination!). Sometimes, a piece of me misses being dull. A piece of me misses settling for less, for just relaxing and being lazy.
Then I remember what life was like when I was dull. And I remember that boring is only good in small quantities -- it's a micronutrient that destroys me when I get carried away with it, when I stop trying and when I stop working towards ambitious endeavors.
So tonight, my cold and I will battle. My weapons: Dayquil, Ricola cough drops, and bed rest. I am already feeling significantly better compared to yesterday, so I hope that it gets fully vanquished soon. I really want to hang out with my Merced friends when I get back to town!
And tomorrow, I will go back to being extraordinary.
Rest up, weary traveler. You have a long journey ahead of you.