Hellooo!

Happy belated one year anniversary to Joeve and Daniel!  xD

I feel fabulous.  Today has been wun-durr-full!  I was lucky enough that the on-and-off storm hit only when I was indoors, and when it hailed, I was one of the delightfully immature lads that ran to the door to peek outside and scream when a piece of "sky ice" hit me on the head.  I finally did great on the Theatre performance, although a friend was uber down today, but I know she'll make it through.  Woe, the various drama.

Things are also great for annooothherrr reeeasoonn.  Happy four-month anniversary (so behind JxD, hah) to Phuc and mee.    It was nice because we got to spend time together after school.  Whoooeoeoeoeoeo!

Today's lesson [courtesy of Miz Engvall]: Hate can only teach others to hate.

sitting here, without a cent, i feel rich when i'm with you

Bye for now.

Heylo.

"Don't you know that love is the greatest thing the world has ever known?"
-B.B. King

I didn't wake up until 1 o'clock today, and I woke up in tears, the aftermath of a bad dream.  I hate bad dreams.

"You need love.  Gotta get it."

I'm still groggy.  I don't even know why I'm blogging about this, of all things.  It's the "just gotta get it down on paper" thing.  I suddenly feel like writing songs and poems, but I'd end up staring at a blank piece of paper for five or so minutes.

It's like art.  I miss art.  Art feels like an exquisitely dead language.  Or at least in my house.  It's thriving right outside, its garden lush with flowers and color.  It feels so gray in here.

I've been feeling so NEGATIVE lately.  Which is weird, because I sincerely can't think of anything wrong in life at the moment, besides the godawful pain that my tongue has after accidentally biting it during dinner yesterday and that I'm worried about Phuc, which is common on a daily basis.  Something just feels wrong and askew.  It's an ugly feeling, as if something bad is going to happen.

Damn the bleakness.  >__<

If I'm not effing jumpy and giddy by tomorrow, I will shoot something with a pool stick, and they will have to try to hit me with shopping carts.

Today's lesson: Listen to the music of the night.

it hurts so much to think of it, so from my thoughts i will exclude

Bye for now.

Heyloo.

Happy Valentine's Eve.  Don't spend too much money. 

Super Mario World (damn straight) has once again possessed me.  I kept my GBA (forget you, Gameboy SP) on my bedstand, so I played it the moment I woke up today.  That's strange.  I swear, I'm going to try to stop, but it's just like some sort of wonderous addiction!  >.>  Phuc, if I bring it to school tomorrow, I want you to slap me.

Today, I went out with my parents for the first time in a while on a Mervyn's/Taco Bell/Best Buy/Arden Mall/TK Noodles Combo.  Mucho fun, although my wallet has reduced in thickness drastically.  Bought lots of Valentine's presents for my parents. 

I swear to you, as I'm writing this, I'm thinking about the strategy I'm going to use on Chocolate Island.  Should I use Mario or Luigi..?

My cat, El Diablo:

is trying to eat my mouse, Algernon:

all the time. (dun dun dunnnnn [oh, the drama!])
But Algernon kicks her booty.  I swear, I'll have proof one day.

>.>.. Mario or Luigi..?

Today's lesson: Even heroes have the right to bleed.

she runs for the hills and doesn't leave a letter

Bye for now.

I am not: as strong as I think I am.
I love: looking back on good memories.
I hate: being pessimistic.
I hear: music in everything.
I regret: spilled milk.
I cry: when I lose hope, when I get more hope than I could've ever dreamed, or when you're not around to see me cry. 
I care: enough to be called naive.
I always: try to be positive.
I long to: give people what they deserve.
I feel alone: when even God isn't there next to me.. which is rare.  ^^
I listen: whenever I can.  Er, except in class.  >.>;
I hide: from strangers.
I drive: people crazy.
I sing: like Luciano Pavarotti.  Kidding; I sing in the shower.
I dance: like a dorky blade of grass on a windy day.
I write: in my xanga, cos' it is just so awesome.  Now I am kissing-up.  The xanga administrator would be proud of me.
I breathe: because it's a privilege.
I miss: the people from San Jose and a particular person that I already see everyday at MTHS..
I say: things without thinking, and regret it afterwards.
I feel: content, yet unfulfilled.  It's complicated.
I succeed: when I really try.
I fail: at waking up on time.
I dream: day and night of happiness.. and not just my own.
I sleep: like an effing bear.  Don't wake me up this winter.
I want: for forever to exist.
I worry: about Phuc.  >_<
I give my all: when I'm in love.
I fight: when I'm pissed off.
I wait: for time to pass.
I am: more than useless.
I think: you are groovy.
I can't: be mature for a day. >.>
I stay: always changing.
I wonder: if you will still be in my life many years from now.

I dare you to smother me with love.  Though you probably won't.  Unless you're Phuc.  ^____^

That, my friends, is the new 'hello'.

And now, fiirst of all..
WHO GOT 5 GRAMMYS LAST NIGHT?!  U2 GOT 5 GRAMMYS LAST NIGHT!  Damn straaaiiiggghht!  XDDD

::deep breaths::

Okay.

There's often a random mental image in my head--a girl in a long ruffled pink dress gesturing for me to be quiet, or a girl with her chin stuck forward, her lips pouted, letting me know she's better than me.  It's very odd, and it's the type of thing that I want to get on paper, something that I want to show and share with people, but every attempt to do so just isn't good enough, not like what I see in my head.  It's frustrating.

I've mentally been daring to think and consider the things that I always said I would never even give a thought to.  It's all positive stuff, mind you.  Like thinking that "forever" exists (you [unless you're joeve or daniel maybe] don't know just how big that is for me), that God is merciful and forgiving, even the concept of someone going through the effort to make me happy (done so long ago by so many good people).  And other.. whatnot to that effect.  I was really going to extend on this and make it really deep, but then I dwindled to the kitchen for a snack and lost my train of thought.

In less than a week: the very first Valentine's Day I won't be spending alone.  <3

On the updating on my days note:
Tuesday was a bunch of fun.  Hung with Pphhhuuuucccc during an effing crazy rollercoaster.  He is quite the awesome person, as you should know.  However, every day since Tuesday, my bumness has been increasing immensely.  My goodness, I'm so lazyyy.. >.<

Today's lesson: When his world is upside down.. turn it around.

you're why the opera is in me

Bye for now.

Good morning, friends.  I request that you don't look at the time that I posted this entry and learn that it's actually early evening.  Ironic how I sell myself out like this?  I know.

Things have been mildly eventful.  Well, the dance went well.  And Diem, I'm sorry, I did not go in Tarzan rags!  The clothes I had ended up okay, although it was no evening gown, haha.    Everyone else says that the dance was pretty lame, and therefore I stand alone in saying that it was fun!  It was my first time dancing, due to the whapping and whines, er, I mean, the fierce lion-like encouragements of Phuc.  I'm proud of myself, in my own strange way.  I wore Phuc's jacket the entire day COS I COULD and I'm disappointed in not stealing his tie.  We stalked Stalky Couple (it's such a complicated story, but with enough merit to be mentioned) and he is cur..a..zyyy.  Haha.  And Phuc is such a dork.  Such a dork.  We took pictures!  I don't know when they're coming, hahah.  Ar ar ar.

Amidst a war ensuing and a new internal war beginning, a passionate and tearful moment still found its way to me.  The death of a woman I didn't even know rendered me in quiet sobs, and I had memories that never belonged to me.  Bless the people that were close to her.  I'm honored to share the tears.

Today's lesson: We do not know the value of a single teardrop or of a single drop of blood.  All is grace.

he said "come with me".. so i went.

Bye for now.

The Blog Entry 'o' Venting.

Okay.  I admit this: I am a spaz.  If you know me at ALL, you know at least that much.  So it's five entire hours before the Sadie Hawkins' Dance, and I've already been freaking out since noon.  Hahah.

The skirt and dress has been banned by the parents.  >.>;  I lost all my nice attire besides that since the move from San Jose (God knows how I've been searching) so right now on my hands I have a white/blue dress shirt and normal black pants.  But I wear this type of clothes to school all the time, so I feel SO funky about wearing this in which everyone else will be wearing the little black dress and strapless stuff.  I've been daydreaming about getting turned away at the door and Phuc and me have to sit at the curb for three hours until my parents come to get me and I will lie about having a great time dancing.    I'm trying to disguise it with awesome kick-ass hair (::cough:: that's a laugh coming from me, so not going to achieve that) and random whatnot to the effect of "I look less crappy than you think I do."  OH GOD WHAT DO I WEAARRRR

I've been stressing (as you might be able to tell), and the weirdest form of stress relief has hit me -- deep breaths and telling myself that I am the next American Idol with a very booming Ryan Seacrest-like voice.

I may or may not blog about the dance later this evening.

Good day to you all.

Good morning!

HAPPY GROUNDHOG DAY!  Six more weeks of winter!  >__<  The groundhog told me so.

Things have been going well.  I realize that I've deprived from all of you the "updating you on my life" part of the blogging experience.  Soo.. lessee.  Today, I became the very sorry excuse of a president (:D here's hoping i improve and get my leader attitude on) of Out Loud, the MTHS club formerly known as Creative Mustangs.  It was a very strenuous and difficult process to reach my dutiful name: a game of "Paper, Scissors, Rock" (shush phuc) between Omega, Phuc, and me. 

The Sadie Hawkins' Dance is coming up this Saturday, my date being Larry-boy in non-cucumber form.  I don't know what I'm going to wear (preferably a matching-to-phuc shirt and deceptive black jeans because i am so confused) because it's semi-formal and the parents don't want me in a skirt.  I'm half tempted (oh oh, Relient K allusion watch out now) to wear khaki pants and a sweater, because there's nothing better.

I talked to The Enemy today.  And it wasn't as bad as I expected.  To The Enemy, I am my surname, and she believes I am fond of her.  (This is where you laugh because that's a slight untruth.)  I am surprised because we bonded.  ::gasps three times simultaneously::

In the air, there is a strange, "Bronecky, I am going to PROVE that you don't know SHIIITT and that I CAN DO THIS." which is odd because nix his anger issues, he was okay today.  IN FACT, I defended him and his ideas today from the rest of the group, of which I had incurred the dormant Bronecky-Hating (trust me, it's in all of us.) in a few of them in the first place.  (Me!  for HIM!!)  Right after I chewed him out for patronizing the rest of us, too.  ("I wonder how a four-year-old can understand this, but the lot of you can't!"  WTF IS THAT?!)  Okay, this was a bitter and spazzy moment.  I apologize.

This is one of my less mature entries.  I apologize for that, too.

::does a little dance::

Today's lesson: Bittersweet memories lead to strange dreams of nostalgia.

you can't foresee intent

Bye for now.